Brian Rogers Rogers Rabbits www.sunlive.co.nz

A few weeks ago this column identified society's overdosing on traffic cones and hi-viz vests.
Our research shows we're so bombarded with fluoro, no one takes notice anymore.

This week we reveal a sinister new twist – a Christchurch rapist is on the loose in a fluoro vest.
It's true, it seems we've become so de-sensitised to these colours, which are supposed to stand out – that we now ignore them.
The Detective investigating says a suspect in a safety hi-viz vest 'wasn't noticed” by people because they thought he was a contractor.
Interesting that the very reason for wearing such a vest, is to stand out and be noticed, yet there's so much of it around that it has the opposite effect, and makes the wearers invisible.
The prophecy is fulfilled.

Foiled by the superpower
How presumptuous of little old NZ. Thinking we could take on the greatest country in the world and win their cup away from them.
As if a bit of ‘she'll be right', number eight wire technology could take down the might of the USA, the nation that won the Second World War for us, faked the moon landings, dealt with naughty Saddam's weapons of mass destruction that were also faked, and successfully prevented Sarah Palin from wrecking the world and our small remnants of good taste.
We've been properly put in our place. Sent home with our tail between our legs. Taken a whipping from the superpower.
We've heard some great excuses for how we managed to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory, going from match point, to game over.
Tell us your excuses for losing the America's Cup and we'll dish out some prizes for the best, and publish your efforts here as some consolation for our second placing in the oldest sporting trophy event in the world. Send your excuse to brian@thesun.co.nz
Time for a change
This weekend is the time to adjust your clocks again for daylight saving.
Those astute readers with good memories may recall that at the end of last summer, some of you experienced considerable difficulties with this task and as a consequence, failed to put your clocks back and have been reading this column an hour early for the entire winter. In extreme cases, some of you were reading it before it was written.
We had given you full instructions on how to adjust your clock, by moving the numbers around the dial so the hands pointed to the right ones. Since then, we've heard that some of you have been taking a cunning short cut to the time-changing process, by actually leaving the numbers in the same position on the clock face, and simply moving the hands to compensate. How cheeky.
While we don't agree with people taking this risky approach, we know that RR readers like to live on the edge. If you're feeling like putting a bit of thrill and danger into your life, you could attempt this radical manoeuvre. Just make sure you end up with the right time on your clock, we do not want to hear any disaster stories and have to refer to any of you as our 'late” readers.
This year would you please pay a lot more attention to the clock situation.

Instructions:
Firstly, to turn your clocks forward for daylight saving, you need to know the difference between your big hand, the small hand, and the second hand. You're hearing this information first hand, so don't be distracted by any other hands, including old hands, deck hands, hand stands, or back handers.
Getting back to the second hands: For those of you with new clocks, they obviously won't be second hand. So you only have two hands to worry about. Your left and right. Unless you are part of Team New Zealand, you really don't want to know about second.
My mother-in-law bought a new clock this week, but it doesn't go. I've only heard the story third hand, but apparently it wasn't second hand so you'd expect it would have worked with both hands. This clock is being turned back alright – to the shop. Meanwhile, back to your mission.
To determine which is the big and the small hands, take your left hand in your right hand and your right hand in your left hand and compare them for size.
Put your left hand in, and shake it all about. Do the hokey tokey and turn around, that's what it's all about. Once you have established the relative size of your hands, take your clock in your left hand, turn the big hand forward a full turn of the clock with your right hand.
If you take your partner by the hand and find they are doing a full turn at the same time, you've accidently come to the wrong class and are in the square dancing lesson. Perform a quick dosey-doe, curtsy and leave the room immediately. Be sure to take all your hands with you.
When your big hand is doing a full turn with the help of your right hand, your small hand should move simultaneously, in synchronisation and at the same time (one of those three will do) exactly one twelfth of the way around the clock. Your left hand should not move at all because it is holding the clock.
By now you should have successfully moved your big hand and your small hand by only moving your right hand. Your clock is now ready to put placed back on the wall, preferably with both your left and right hands.
This may require climbing on a chair or ladder. Please take care. Nearly 100 per cent of falls around the house happen in the home. (If someone falls from a ladder, check to see if they've rung for help).
Use appropriate safety gear, put cones around the base of the ladder to prevent tripping and hang on tight to the ladder, preferably with your right hand, assuming the left hand is still holding the clock with the big hands and the small hands in the correct position. Have someone with big hands hold the base of the ladder to steady it. This person, for safety reasons, should be wearing a fluoro vest. Be careful not to ask the rapist.
Climb the ladder and place the clock with both your hands, the clock with both hands, on the wall.
Well done. Give yourself a big hand.