The Christmas season is traditionally a time for connecting with family. For those newly-divorced, separated or widowed, navigating their way through the festive season can be challenging. This is where Kathryn Michel can help.

Through C3 City Church, Kathryn facilitates a one-night course in November called ‘Surviving the Holidays,' and in February, a 13-week ‘Divorce Care' course.

Having been divorced herself, Kathryn understands the change in family dynamics can be hard for many people.

'For those who are newly on their own or who have a new or different family situation, the lead up to Christmas, the parties, and the day itself can be difficult.”

For those sharing custody of children, it may also mean the first Christmas without their tamariki, or a change in budget available for present shopping.

Kathryn encourages people to be kind to themselves during this time. 'Don't put too high expectations on yourself.”

When faced with these changes, Kathryn believes it's important to be prepared to do things a little differently. 'Create new memories for yourself, or with your children.

'Do something different – especially if you find yourself alone on Christmas Day. Do something out of the box!”

When it comes to end-of-year parties, where partners would have once attended, Kathryn's message is again one of self-care and new experiences.

'Don't feel you have to go to everything – sometimes it's better not to go.

'Where you used to take a partner, it can now feel very uncomfortable, so allow yourself to not attend if that's the case.”

Supporting others in this area is important for Kathryn as she well remembers her first Christmas after her divorce. By reaching out and helping others in similar situations she is able to share some of the tips and strategies that were useful for her.

'That first year, I bought myself my own Christmas present. My children loved seeing it under the tree tucked in with their gifts...And, of course, it was exactly the gift I wanted!”

With Covid restrictions in the past two years, Kathryn believes it's benefited those she supports. 'People have had to learn quickly how to be alone, which is strangely somewhat of an advantage.”

Asked if she could sum her advice up into one thought, Kathryn reiterates the importance of making sure you 'treat yourself well” this Christmas.