Brian Rogers Rogers Rabbits www.sunlive.co.nz

Some outstanding cases of male moronity have come to the fore this week.

Alasdair Thompson may or may not be correct about his comment on women's monthly sick days, but between him and the Jetstar Slasher, they've once again firmly proven the case that men can be just plain stupid.

Even if it were true about his alleged women's impairment due to a monthly sick day, it's nothing compared to the handicap that men try to deal with every day of the week: simply the tendency to be just plain idiots.

How few times have we seen women making the headlines for doing really dumb stuff? For acts of pure, plain stupid? For a comment that just so insanely inane, the country has rolled off their chairs laughing? Well at least not since Sue Bradford left politics.

But this week, right on cue, a handful of male chooks have again shown that whatever biological hurdle women might encounter, it pales into insignificance compared to the weight of lunacy that men have to shoulder and suppress every day.

Not only was it the hapless Alasdair that helped men retain the ‘Crown of Clowns' this week. There's also Hone, coming up with a clanger virtually every week.

And here's another male strokes of genius: Former Wanganui mayor Michael Laws and Maori activist Ken Mair are to square off in the boxing ring. The fundraiser for Christchurch earthquake, on December 3, promises to be a great scrap.

Mair reckons he'll knock Laws over in the first round, on behalf of the four millions New Zealanders who'd like to do it. Laws says he's been looking forward to punching Mair for 20 years.

Here at RR, we see potential for a whole series of scraps around the country to sort out political differences. Send us your suggestions for match ups you'd like to see having a crack at each other. Yet again, it shows that men are indeed, the Masters of Mature Thinking.

But there's more from the Male Arsenal of Maturity and Dependability: The Jetstar Slasher whips out the ferret and shows an entire airliner just what he's made of. To make matters worse, it turns out he's the offspring of one of our most successful and sensible women. Isn't that ironic?

Then we have the breaking news that Tauranga is to get hooters. Now you might think we are talking about tsunami warning sirens. Well, that's only part of the story. The other hooters coming our way; The Boobs on Bikes tour.

That's right, to show our superior intellect, employability qualities, plus incredible business acumen – men have organised for a bunch of half naked porn stars and strippers to ride through town on the back of Harleys so we can leer and laugh. Classy, eh.

Some may argue that it is the women who are stupid. But hey, they are getting paid well for this. What better way to earn some serious dollars, but to flash your norks in winter.

As for the tsunami hooters, they're not coming for a while yet. Shame, because there was a tsunami alert this week from the Kermadecs and because we've been dithering around on the decision to get sirens (men at work here?) they won't be installed for some time yet.
In the meantime, RR Research Department (mostly men) has come up with a brilliant idea to keep us warned in the meantime.

We suggest the head of civil defence and his committee go into their backyards and start howling. Woooooooooo.
When the neighbours hear this, they too need to go into their yards or street, and howl like demented wolves. Pretty much just like when the Boobs on Bikes tour comes around. In fact, the Hooter parade will be excellent practice for the Hooters for Tsunami exercise.

With this system, there will be a chain reaction of howling right around the region, so really, the sirens will be obsolete. We're expecting about 20,000 dogs from the Western Bay of Plenty region to join in and probably the screamers who voice the TV ads for Harvey Norman and that carpet place.

To get the community behind the Hooters at Home system, we are announcing a special practice run this Saturday at noon.

All of you are required, on the exact stroke of midday, to go outside and howl, like your neighbourhood depended on it. We will be listening.
The best video of manic howling will be posted on SunLive and win a prize. So ladies, if you have a male silly enough (translation: male that can read) keep the video camera handy and grab 30 seconds of the male species at their finest. Send us the clips and you'll be in to win.
Not only is this a test of the Hooters system, it will also be a test of just how ridiculous mankind can really be.

You can guarantee that it will be mostly the men stupid enough to do it.