Brian Rogers Rogers Rabbits www.sunlive.co.nz

The really big news this week is not the RWC and Tauranga's pitiful part in it.

Nor is it the government's scramble to legalise video surveillance of dodgy characters.

The big news, largely missed by the national media, is the revelation by songbird Hayley Westenra that she can hit notes beyond the range of human hearing. Apparently, only animals can detect these notes.

There are some critics out there who say she should sing in those ranges all of the time.

It could also explain the sudden disappearance of Happy Feet, who, once he was closer to the South Pole, also went to the Deed Poll and changed his name to Unhappy Ears on hearing Ms Westenra's high notes that only animals can hear. Then clapped his flippers firmly over his unhappy ears and didn't re-surface.

A half cocked story

On the subject of wayward creatures, a French rugby supporter was caught trying to smuggle a rooster into the Napier stadium. Roosters are a national symbol for France and releasing a cockerel into stadium grounds has become a fan ritual at matches. One French national was arrested for disorderly behaviour and another was evicted from the ground for indecent exposure. He must have really been confused about the ritual of releasing a cock.

Drop the pilot

Police and aviation security went into a tail spin about the actions of a phoney pilot who allegedly tried to gain access to restricted areas of Auckland airport. It's reported that the poser dressed in an authentic-looking uniform, including a pilot's cap with a silver winged badge, epaulets and gold bands on the shoulders of his shirt and carrying a large black briefcase. Here at RR headquarters we believe the dress up must have been convincing. But the giveaway – he left in a black Hi Ace van with tinted windows. We all know that no self-respecting pilot would be seen in one of those. Nothing less than an Audi would do.

Save the gingas

A horrific report surfaced this week of an evil plan to rid the gene pool of gingas.

It says gingers are being banned from sperm banks because of a policy to keep the ginga gene out of future populations.

This is barbaric. In fact, exactly what Hitler tried to do.

It is time for the rest of us to stand up for our ginga brothers and sisters and denounce this nonsense immediately.

I hate to think what the world would be like without our ginger friends. Apart from missing Maggie Barry and a fair percentage of Scotland, there would be no one to pick on.

And guess who would be next in line – dumb blondes.

How boring would the world be if dumb blondes were the first line of victims in cruel jokes?

For starters, they don't get the joke, therefore there would be little response – just a vague, 'huh?”

At least with a feisty ginga, you get an immediate and intelligent response and depending on how far you've pushed them, often a good bashing.

Taxing the brain

This, from astute reader Tony, commenting on suggestions that higher income earners should pay even more tax.

• You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity by legislating the wealthy out of prosperity.

• What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.

• The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.

• You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it.

• When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them – and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that is the beginning of the end of any nation.

Parting shot

Finally, there's a bit of speculation that the rivalry between NZ-Aussie is getting out of hand. Here at RR we think it's all good clean fun and a bit of ribbing between the cuzzies is healthy.

Which reminds me of this story doing the rounds this week from astute reader Peter and about 50 others:

An Australian teacher asks her students if they're Wallabies fans.

Everyone raises their hand except one little girl.

The teacher says 'Why aren't you a Wallabies fan?”

'I am an All Blacks fan.”

The teacher asks why. 'Because my mum is an All Blacks fan and my dad is an All Blacks fan, so I'm an All Blacks fan too!”

The teacher says, 'That is no reason. What if your mum was a moron and your dad was a moron, what would you be then?”

'Then I'd be a Wallabies fan.”