News Hound Ady & Flo

Fireworks night has been and gone, except for those losers who think they can continue to let off anywhere, anytime.

It wouldn't be so bad for animals if it was only one night a year. Unfortunately for my furry friends, there are many idiots out there who will continue to torment the wildlife and the community throughout the year.

Time the things were banned, I say. Mr Key, snuff out the nonsense now.

Not that it worries me greatly, as the boss has me in training for gundog duty. So I'm kind of learning to handle the scary sounds around the neighbourhood.

Plus my friendly trainer Wendy is teaching me to remain a cool customer in the face of gunfire, mayhem and even ferocious Green party rallies involving a rabid Robyn Malcolm. Geez, she must have distemper.

Not so for some others I've heard about, who've suffered through fireworks. I've lots of horror stories. There's a few horses around the place who think they've stumbled into an episode of Bonanza. They're expecting Hoss and Little John to come galloping along the trail with injuns on their tail.

Flo and her friend Millie, sporting her fireworks-proof vest.

Some of my canine friends aren't very happy either. One big old fella we heard about this week got worked into a complete lather on Guy Fawkes night, bolted through the bathroom and collided with the toilet bowl, smashing it and cutting his jowl.

We wish him well and hope he has a speedy recovery – and a good plumber.

Personally, I hung out with my little buddy Millie, up in the Welcome Bay hills. We had a good view of the city going nuts with fire and brimstone, but it all got a bit tiresome after a while, so we just dug holes in Millie's lawn. We decided the hole was a bit naughty so we buried it. In another hole. Oh dear, as they say, when you're in a hole, stop digging.

I guess that's something Wendy is yet to teach me. Meanwhile Ady was on patrol at The Strand, sniffing out pyromaniacs downtown.
Flo.

The entire thing was a little limp wristed to be honest, which I do not have a problem with, as to me it is a total waste of time.

The only problem the boss and I had was a couple of pillocks letting off sky rockets outside our bedroom window. The boss had to crawl out of the scratcher, disturbing me in the process, (rather rude) and giving them the old spotlight in the eyes trick, then telling them to take a hike.

It was only when I turned up, to give my impersonation of a big bad dog, did they finally move.

So it was all a big non event and really that is what it should be. Guns going off I can obviously handle, but all those screeching things whizzing around, is a little much for a canine's constitution and it sounded like a night in Baghdad.

No worries as we are now heading into party season, not that there should have to be a season for parties, but there is nothing better than firing up the barbecue with a few mates and having a barking good time. So get into it all, have fun and a few laughs. Cheers all and see you next week.
Ady.

Training by Wendy Graydon,
The Dog Trainer. 0210 700 111
Repairs and Maintenance: The Mobile Vet 0800 VETCALL
Sustenance: Ziwipeak.
We do all our own stunts.