Brian Rogers Rogers Rabbits www.sunlive.co.nz

Saluting those who made dubious contributions to humanity in 2015

It's that time of the year again, well the end of it, to be precise, when we honour those who have made the last 12 months memorable, entertaining and generally saved us from the dreary humdrum of life on the planet.

Take a cynical stroll down memory lane with Rogers Rabbits as we recount some of the highlights, but mainly lowlights, of another year of the human race behaving mostly like twats.

Cats and gunfire

In 2015 Gareth Morgan continued to hate cats. Woolly crochet pants made a comeback (were they ever in?) and Kiwi drivers found a way to prevent reckless tourist driving, by confiscating car keys.

There was quite a lot of gunfire during the year, especially in the US, where mass shootings seem to be a weekly occurrence. France took a bit of a hammering, too, with 12 gunned down and 11 injured in an attack on the Charlie Hebdo magazine; then the world was stunned with a series of bombings and shootings in Paris killing 130 in November.

Handguns killed 48 people in Japan, eight in Britain, 34 in Switzerland, 52 in Canada, 42 in West Germany and 10,728 in the United States. Which suggests that perhaps handguns are out of control in the USA. Although here at RR, we wonder if it simply means Americans are better shots.

Unwanted invaders

Europe continues to grapple with a massive refugee crisis; although it could be worse, Kim Dotcom hasn't arrived yet.

And speaking of aliens, the Bay of Plenty rallied against invasion of the Brown Marmorated Stink Bug. The BMSB, as it known to its friends, is one the kiwifruit industry's ‘most unwanted' biosecurity threat after the Queensland fruit fly and Justin Bieber.

Throughout the year the country has either anguished or ignored the discussion over whether we need a new flag; and if so, what should it look like. It's fair to say that no matter the result, 71 per cent of people won't agree with 67 per cent.

A nasty oil spill in the harbour made quite a stink and took most of the year to clean up. It messed up wharves and marinas and got all over former AC/DC drummer Phil Rudd's boat when he'd already had a difficult year.

Cycleway success

We applied the Rogers Rabbits Sensibility Meter to the city council decision to decline funding for a cycleway, from Otumoetai to the Wairoa River. The sensibility meter went berserk…the council pulled a U-turn and decided it would crank on with helping fund the bike track. A happy ending there.

In April, 8000 died in Nepal after a 7.8 earthquake. Alaska rolled into 2015 on a high, legalising marijuana.

And speaking of highness, The Duchess of Cambridge so elegantly popped out an 8.3 pounder, Her Royal Highness Princess Charlotte Elizabeth Diana.

Every year, her uncle looks even more like James Hewitt.

Beamed up

Hairy Maclary and his friends were immortalised in statues on The Strand.

Leonard Nimoy, aka Spock, was beamed up in February. The world also lost BB King, Dusty Rhodes, Omar Sharif, Christopher Lee and Jonah Lomu.

Donna Douglas, who played Elly May Clampett, in The Beverly Hillbillies, died aged 81. Incidentally, several of the shows from 1964 still rate among the most-watched TV programmes ever made, with the exception of the Super Bowls.

Halfway through the year the magnificent new TEL expressway opened and NASA's flashy New Horizon spaceship completed a drive-by of Pluto, giving anyone who cares a close-up look at the planet.

Real news was displaced for several weeks while the world obsessed with transgender Bruce Jenner who turned his-self into a girl. Snoop Dogg summed it up well, but took a social slapping, for calling him a 'science project”.

Former US president Jimmy Carter got cancer, then cured it. TV3 finally cured itself of ‘Campbell Live'.

Good results

NZ youngsters scored free GP visits for children under 13, parental leave was increased and the pollies negotiated the Trans-Pacific Partnership Agreement and signed a free trade deal with Korea.

NZ won the rugby world cup, again.

Crime in NZ went down 4.2 per cent.

Pope Francis became the first pontiff to visit the USA in 50 years. He was one of the three people in the USA who weren't shot at this year.

Climate comics

Yet another climate change agreement is approved in Paris, by a whole bunch of people who flew there in gas-guzzling aeroplanes. Meanwhile back in Tauranga, NIWA confirms the sea level here hasn't changed in 42 years.

And despite the fact the sea levels aren't rising, there's been a rash of water tragedies and it's still a good idea to wear a lifejacket, have several means of waterproof communication and check the weather forecast before going boating. Join the Coastguard. Take care out there.

News cover 24/7

The news will continue to roll into the New Year and the Sun newspaper will be back with bells on, in the first week.

Meanwhile, your ever-faithful 24/7 news service, SunLive, will keep you informed of the Bay's big stories and breaking news right through the summer.

Check into the region's leading news provider, www.sunlive.co.nz for all your local news, delivered instantly, every hour, every day.

Have a safe and happy New Year, from all of us at the Sun.

Email: brian@thesun.co.nz
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