Brian Rogers Rogers Rabbits www.sunlive.co.nz

All fishermen are liars, except you and me, but I ain't so sure about you.

So the old saying goes. Seems like nothing has changed, only we are now very sure about some fishers, with revelations that industrial fishing fleets kill two or three times the number of fish they report.

Worse, it seems the ministry that's supposed to guard our ocean resources couldn't manage its way out of a soggy fish and chip wrapper.

Research by University of Auckland makes a mockery of the Quota Management System and confirms what every recreational fisher has long suspected… that the much-paraded quota system is a joke.

Actually it's much worse than a joke, it is a conspiracy. A government ministry and a pillaging industry in collusion. We couldn't have written a better movie script if we tried.

Adding to the research is the evidence, as even the best fishermen will tell you; It's getting tougher to catch a feed these days. You know someone is lying when despite this, those who manage fisheries keep trying to tell us the resource is in good shape.

Then there's the real smoking gun… trails of dead fish littering the ocean, from unscrupulous commercial operators who have dumped perfectly good fish over the side to suit their greedy commercial gains.

I will start believing the ministry and the fishing industry, when the trail of evidence isn't found floating on the surface. Until then, recreational fishers can assume that the fish stocks are being plundered left, right and bloody centre.

The ministry will continue to make soothing noises, all to try to keep face and maintain NZ's supposed environmental status as the good guys of the seas. Codswallop.

We're not talking a recent thing here.

'The deliberate misreporting of catch to the United Nations for more than 50 years demonstrates a serious level of dysfunction in the Ministry for Primary Industries. This is a major concern given that the ministry and Minister, Nathan Guy, are tasked with overseeing the quota system on behalf of the public,” says LegaSea's spokesperson Richard Baker.

It is clear there's been gross negligence on the part of MPI allowing the illegal destruction of our natural resource.

Heads at MPI need to fall on the iki stick.

Feed the fish

So that's enough grumping. Here's some good news… someone planning to save and feed the fish rather than killing them.

According to the NZ Underwater Association, a Florida brewery has developed edible six-pack rings, with the aim of feeding animals.

'It's a big investment for a small brewery created by fisherman, surfers and people who love the sea,”according to Peter Agardy, head of brand at the Saltwater Brewery.

The rings are believed to be the first of their kind and the small brewery hopes the concept will catch on with the big companies. Drink can plastic rings are renowned killers of marine wildlife. But the Saltwater product is 100 per cent biodegradable and edible, created from barley and wheat ribbons from the brewing process. They are as durable as the plastic ones and the brewery hopes the price will drop as more companies use the concept.

Now all we need is a cigarette company to invent the edible butt, and all those smokers who persist in not only polluting our airspace with their disgusting habit, can stop littering the streets, by biting their own butt.

Ballooning problem

And while we're trying to save the ocean, one beer can at a time, here's another tip. Those emotionally-touching balloon releases are causing havoc in the oceans.

Remember if you let one go, there's a 70 per cent chance it will land in the ocean, since that's roughly the percentage of sea. Even more likely if you release a balloon from skinny little NZ.

That misty-eyed moment of remembrance of a loved one, or whatever event, may end up being the slow demise of a sea critter. Try flowers instead.

Free power the bridge

Finally a thumbs up for the excellent plan revealed in the Sun recently, to light up The Strand Railway Bridge. Here at RR we reckon it would be cool to have tide-powered generators to supply the light show. There's free energy passing under that bridge on a reliable and renewable basis. Let's tap into that!

And how about some spin bicycles mounted on the boardwalk or the reclamation, connected to alternators? The more you pedal, the more the lights flash up. It would be a great tourist attraction.

That's the end of my quota of bright ideas. Have a great weekend and enjoy the fishing.

brian@thesun.co.nz